Musings of an Introvert

thoughts

Today I am writing to you using my Apple Pencil. This is pretty cool. Had I thought of this yesterday, I could've hammered out a quick post. Anyway, I'm just awaiting the wife as she gets her latest checkup with the OB. It's quite exciting, the countdown to parenthood. In the mean time, we are working on getting our affairs in order, so that we will be ready for the little guy.

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It's been a spell, but I'm back at it. I've been doing a lot of thinking, and a lot of working, to be honest. I was unsuccessful with my attempt at getting a new job, but it was definitely a good experience.

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I’m currently awaiting some big news. Hoping it’s positive, but nothing is certain. Nothing ever is, though! If the news is not positive, I will need to rethink my strategy and see what’s next. It’s quite a situation, I tell you. Been a nerve wracking experience, but it has really shown me that I want something, and need to keep improving if I’m going to get where I want to be.

#thoughts

I had to. It's another Star Wars day, a day of remembrance for myself, as I lost an uncle three years ago on this day. It's a day for me to remember one of the role models I had who helped me start out on the path that has brought me to where I am today.

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Although I’m a bit stressed about an upcoming job interview, and many tasks that need to be completed with regards to prepping for an incoming baby, I’m finding tonight nice and peaceful. Maybe it’s the amphibious choir out back, or maybe it’s the fact that the TV is off and wifey and I are simply existing. She’s rounding out the baby shower registry, and I’m dumping thoughts out of my head and onto this blog.

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I love getting up early. Rainy days do make it harder, but a dark, rainy morning is comforting in its own way. For starters, I'm sitting pretty in my reading (and writing) chair, warm and dry, while the sky has opened up outside. I also find rainy days great for writing. I'm not sure why, but maybe I'll think about that today.

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I just finished sorting out my taxes. Gonna owe a good chunk of change. I know that owing taxes means you're doing something right (i.e. making a lot of money), but I'm still a bit chafed about owing so much. I'm also chafed because it obviously lead to an argument with the missus. Although that could've likely been avoided if I reacted better.

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It is my belief that in order to move forward, I need to be satisfied with where you are in life. While I also believe that there has to be a desire to set and achieve goals, I can't let not achieving my goals (at all, or quickly enough) ruin my life.

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These days, almost every day, I experience fear. Not always in the same capacity, but it's there. Most days I make things up to be afraid of; other days I am given a reason to be afraid. It is generally not the external forces that make me fearful, but the internal.

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Today I achieved a milestone, against the odds. It felt fantastic. To me, when work pays off, and the optimal outcome is realized, there are few greater feelings.

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